The First

This morning we awoke to the first snow of the season.

I could feel the excitement in Isaac’s voice when he first opened the door, despite being on the other side of the house. Pure excitement, the kind that makes your voice hit a few octaves higher than you ever realized you could.

That excitement, that joy, it won’t happen again, at least not until next year. This first of the season. It’s the same with the first ball game of the season, the first swim of the summer, the first pumpkin patch visit of fall. These firsts of the season, so exciting and breathtaking and joyful and new.

When we found out we were pregnant with Tyler, those emotions wouldn’t ever be repeated. And when we heard his heartbeat for the very first time, or saw his tiny, blurry outline on the monitor, or watched as the sonogram tech typed boy next to the little white arrow between his stubby legs. Those emotions are forever ingrained in my heart. They can’t ever be repeated. 

And then it’s spring, summer, and fall.

And we’re having another baby. New emotions, different yet similar, surface. A second baby’s heartbeat, a second baby’s tiny, slightly blurry outline, a second little white arrow between two stubby legs with the letters b-o-y appear on the screen. Nervousness over how we will handle two little boys, giggles over thoughts of starting savings accounts now for the grocery bill when they are teenagers, and apprehension of the change that’s in store for our little toddler at home. 

And then it’s spring, summer, and fall.

And we’re having another baby. A surprise baby. More new emotions combined with some sense of knowledge. We’ve done this before, we can do it again. A third baby’s heartbeat, a 3D image with another little white arrow (we didn’t even need the letters by this point, we got it.) and stubby legs with teeny tiny toes. Nervousness and fear, we’re outnumbered now. Serious discussion ensues about that savings account. Apprehension, out first little baby is going to Kindergarten, will he still feel special, will he still feel loved when our attention is split three ways? Will we ever sleep again?

There’s nothing like the first snow, the first something of every season. Sure, the snowflakes look a lot like the ones from last season. Up close, they are so different, unique and perfect all on their own. They don’t worry about being compared to the snowflakes from last season, those are melted, moving through the Earth’s ground and giving life to plants and animals. A new season for them.

Those tiny baby’s with teeny tiny toes are big now. Their toes are running and playing. It’s a new excitement, a new nervousness, the first of a new season. 

I’m happily taking part in Bigger Picture Blogs Simple Moments held today at Lenae’s. Link up!

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